Have you been on an online dating site for a while, and it’s time for your first date? You’re probably really nervous and not quite sure how to handle the situation.
Maybe you haven’t scheduled a date yet, but you’re ready to. You just haven’t pulled the trigger because you’re not quite sure what to do or what to expect. You don’t want to overstep your boundaries, but you don’t want to miss out on any opportunities either and seem boring. This article explains some good first date etiquette; click for more info.
We have a short guide on what to expect if you’ve been thinking about going on your first date.
You should try and do something relaxing before your first date. You’re probably going to be wound up so tight; you’re nearly climbing the walls.
Go to the gym, go for a run, take a hot bath; it doesn’t matter. Whatever activity normally relaxes you and eases stress will be sufficient. This clears your head and takes a lot of stress off your shoulders. Things will feel more natural, and you won’t seem like a robot or too stiff.
Plan something casual but has a level of activity you can both enjoy. Miniature golf, darts, bowling, or a theme park are all great options. They keep both of you busy, which avoids moments of awkward silence. When there is a flow to the date, things seem to go a lot smoother.
Dinner is okay too, but it puts the emphasis on your dialogue. If you are both shy, it could ruin what might have been an otherwise good connection just because you both felt awkward for lack of communication.
You want the date to be active and take the attention off either one of you being on the spot. However, you want to avoid things being too active. You don’t want to embarrass one another. Avoid things like:
- Rollerblading/Roller skating
The first date is already stressful enough without going through something you might not be good at.
Plan Something for Immediately After the Date
You should have a small event planned that you need to be present for right after the date. This can be drinks with friends, dinner with your parents, an activity with your kid; it doesn’t matter. It just needs to start fairly close to when the date will be ending. This works two ways.
If the date sucks, you can use this event to end it early.
If you’re having a good time, it avoids the date going on for too long and leaves more for the imagination for next time.
Don’t Have Expectations
You want to go into the date open-minded. Don’t paint too much of a picture of the other person in your head before the date. If your expectations are too high, you might end up being disappointed.
Don’t let a lot ride on the first date. Normally people are nervous, and they might not be the person you met online. Not yet, anyway. This could change as time goes on.
People tend to be less nervous online and can be themselves because they’re not face-to-face with someone. The first date could be awkward until they get comfortable with you and eventually start taking on their normal persona. Some people just need time to come out of their shells.
Don’t Get Too Personal
You want to avoid sensitive topics like politics or religion. These things can be talked about after you’ve gotten more comfortable with each other and know how not to offend one another.
However, the first date can turn into a disaster if you talk about a subject that is too touchy. If you end up offending the other person, it could ruin the date, and you’ll never know what might have been. Then, it’s back to the drawing board. Wait until later to offend them.
Two-Hour Time Limit
Even when you hit it off with someone, you want to keep the date at about two hours. You and your date should pace yourself. This leads to more butterflies in anticipation of your next date.
There should be enough time between to allow the two of you to miss each other’s company. Remember, absence makes the heart grow fonder.
Here are some additional tips to follow that can lead to a higher success rate.
- Don’t drink too much
- Whoever planned the date should pay
- If it feels right, make a move
- Don’t be afraid to ask for the second date before the first one ends.
- Don’t call or text them too soon after you part ways. This makes you seem desperate.
Just Be You
We’ve found the best advice to take is when all else fails, just be you. If someone can’t accept you for who you are, then the relationship wouldn’t have been any good for you anyway. Don’t let anyone make you feel like you need to be another person or act differently in order to win their affection.
The more transparent you can be from the beginning, the higher your chances are of finding real love. You want to build any relationship on a solid foundation of truth. Anything less can lead to things falling apart later after you’ve both invested time and feelings.